Digging Deeper: Honor Thy Mother

Being a man, I can only offer my experiential perspective on motherhood. I was fortunate to have a great mom who lived a life of sacrifice and humility. I like to think I inherited her softer side, but I probably inherited more of my father’s analytical, slightly standoffish nature. My mother was the kind of mom who would let her kids win the games we played, eat the first burnt pancake, and tend to our many cuts and scrapes. She was a friend to all, a mother to many, and a devoted wife.

My mother was, however, far from perfect. She could never quite duplicate my Polish grandmother’s meatloaf, and her children never let her forget it. Do not judge me! She was quick to accept blame for others’ failures, but she thankfully learned to lovingly stand up for herself when the situation warranted it. The things she taught me are exemplified in the Fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22–23). Her strongest attributes were patience, kindness, and a genuine joy in loving others.

My siblings and I obeyed my father out of respect and, at times, out of fear. We always obeyed my mother out of love—we deeply desired not to disappoint her. I vividly remember going through my divorce and the pain it brought my parents. My mother cared very much for my wife, and it pained her to see our family dissolve. I felt a deep sense of shame and guilt for disappointing my parents. My mother unwaveringly supported me and never once displayed an ounce of judgment or condemnation toward either party. While her reaction should not have surprised me, I still struggled with the feeling that I had let her down.

I continue to honor my mother even today, though she passed away in 2004. Every time I discover a new recipe (my meatloaf is not even close to my grandmother’s), see beautiful wildflowers, or play with my grandkids the way she played with hers, I say a prayer of thanks to the One who created her.

I challenge each of you to honor and love your mother, no matter the season of life you are walking through. If she has passed away, honor her memory and thank God for the traits—both good and not-so-good—that she passed on to you. If she is still in your life, enjoy the time you have with her and honor her continued presence. If you are estranged from your mother, I pray that God will soften the hearts of all involved. Time is a commodity we cannot control, and reconciliation can occur with God’s help and in His timing.

God created mothers for a very special, yet very difficult, task. Honor your mother—not just on a day marked on the calendar—but celebrate her throughout the year.