Have you ever had something you wanted to say but didn’t know how to say it? Maybe you know exactly what you’re feeling, but when you try to put it into words, it comes out completely different. I think a lot of us feel that way about prayer. We know we’re supposed to pray. We know God wants us to pray. But when we actually close our eyes and start talking to Him, we think, “Am I doing this right?”
That question can become even harder to answer when life gets difficult. When everything is going well, it can be easy to thank God for His goodness. But when you’re anxious about the future, hurting from a relationship, or watching someone you love suffer… what are you supposed to say? How do you pray when you don’t understand what God is doing?
I think one of the most helpful places to look is the Garden of Gethsemane. On the night before His crucifixion, Jesus went away to pray. Matthew 26 tells us that He became anguished and distressed. He even told His disciples that His soul was crushed with grief. Jesus knew what was coming. He knew He was about to face betrayal, suffering, and the cross.
And what did Jesus do? He prayed.
Think about what Jesus was doing. He was not pretending that the coming suffering was easy. He was not hiding His anguish or acting like He had no desire for the cup to pass. He openly expressed what He wanted. He asked His Father to take away the suffering that lay ahead.
That is an incredible example for us because sometimes we approach prayer as though we have to clean ourselves up before we can talk to God. We think we need to find the right words, control our emotions, or convince ourselves that everything is okay. But Jesus shows us that we can come to the Father honestly. We can tell Him what hurts. We can ask Him to intervene. We can bring Him the things we desperately want Him to change.
Hebrews 4:16 invites us to approach God’s throne of grace boldly so that we can receive mercy and find grace when we need it most. God is not asking us to pretend we have everything figured out. Because of Jesus, we can bring our real selves before Him.
So how do we actually do that? When you don’t know what to say, it can help to have a simple framework for prayer. One tool I learned in high school is the ACTS prayer model. It is not the only way to pray, and it is certainly not a formula that guarantees a particular answer. Think of it as four lanes that can guide your mind when you aren’t sure where to start.
A — Adoration. Start by telling God what you love about Him. Tell Him that He is holy, good, faithful, powerful, gracious, or whatever characteristics of God you have seen in Scripture or experienced in your own life. When life feels uncertain, remembering who God is can help ground you. You may not understand your circumstances, but you can still remind yourself that God is worthy of your trust.
C — Confession. Bring your sin and struggles to God. Maybe there is something you’ve been hiding, something you’ve done that you know was wrong, or an area where you’ve been struggling to follow Him. God already knows it, but confession is about acknowledging it before Him and asking for forgiveness. We don’t have to pretend when we pray. Because of Jesus, we can come honestly and confidently before God.
T — Thanksgiving. Take time to thank God for what He has done. Maybe you thank Him simply for saving you. Maybe you thank Him for your family, friends, church, or something specific He has done in your life recently. This does not mean pretending that your circumstances are good when they are painful. It means remembering that even in difficult seasons, God has not stopped being God. You can thank Him for His presence, His promises, and the grace He has already given you.
S — Supplication. Ask God for what you need. Bring Him the big things and the little things. Tell Him where you’re struggling to see Him at work and ask Him to make Himself known. Pray for your family, friends, future, workplace, relationships, and the things weighing on you. But don’t be afraid to ask God for big things either. Ask Him to save people, heal what is broken, give you opportunities to share the gospel, and use your life for His purposes.
Again, this isn’t the only way to pray. The goal isn’t to turn prayer into a formula. It’s simply a place to start when you don’t know what to say.
Yesterday, we talked about the new relationship and new access we have because of Jesus. Today, I want you to actually use that access. You don’t need the perfect words. You don’t need to sound spiritual. You don’t need to know exactly what to say. You simply need to start talking to your Father.
You have a new relationship with God. You have new access to God. Now, talk to Him.