Author: Lee Wilson

It is said that purple is the color of royalty. In fact, ancient law made it so. Ancient Roman and Elizabethan law forbade the common population from wearing the color, limiting it legally only to the ruling class. Violators would face the death penalty.

The Byzantine Empire featured rulers who donned purple attire, signed royal decrees and documents in purple ink, and whose offspring were referred to as being “born in the purple.” In ancient Japanese culture, purple was a sign of wealth and authority.

Part of the appeal of the color was its scarcity and difficulty to produce. Its origins are from the ancient city of Tyre in Phoenicia (modern-day Lebanon). It required gathering tens of thousands of murex sea snails and extracting their tiny mucus glands and then simmering or fermenting them in salt vats for days. The complex, intensive process and multitude of snails required to yield a single gram of purple dye is said to make it “more valuable than gold.”

When Paul is sharing the gospel on a riverbank in Macedonia, one among his audience is Lydia, who is denoted as a “seller of purple goods.” This is no small distinction. Lydia would have been a successful and wealthy businesswoman whose primary clientele would have been limited to the elite social, wealthy class.

Finding success like that in ancient times would have required a lot more than LinkedIn posts and good networking skills. Historians believe Lydia was likely a member of the dyer’s guild that existed in Thyatira and suggest that she moved to Philippi to ply her trade. Given the customer base she had, it is reasonable to presume she lived in spacious accommodations while there.

Once she heard Paul sharing the gospel, she converted to Christianity and was baptized along with her household. Then, she insisted on being hospitable, urging Paul and his group to stay with her.

Luke records, “she prevailed upon us,” when she was insisting they come back to her house. This insinuates a persistent urging, an unrelenting plea from this new believer. Given the persuasive techniques of a successful saleswoman, it is no surprise she was able to convince them to join her. The fact that she was a successful person yielded a house spacious enough to accommodate the entire group and take excellent care of the weary travelers.

The lesson here is that Lydia was working towards something, but she didn’t even know what it was. Her work ethic and subsequent success were aimed at natural desires – financially and otherwise. However, all of that was preparing her for this moment, where she would travel to ply her trade to a foreign land just to encounter a group of believers who would bring Jesus to her doorstep.

Lydia is the first documented European believer in Jesus, and her house, built on the wealth and success of her business, became the first European church in history. God weaved a purpose into her story beyond what she could see, but once she heard the call, she did not relent and pursued him.

God can sow many wondrous things into our lives, using even the mundane to paint a marvelous masterpiece, if only we answer when he calls without relenting and pursue him above all else.

I have never set out to sin, planning my day around deceitful or sinful behavior. Those things seem to come naturally. Our sinful nature instinctively resists obedience because our hearts are naturally rebellious (Romans 3:23).

Perhaps that is why God gives us commands and instructions in Scripture to begin with. The Bible is filled with direct, intentional instruction, correction, and guidance. When God commands us to avoid adultery (Exodus 20:14), and later Jesus reinforces that command with even greater clarity (Matthew 5:27–28), it becomes unmistakably clear that this is something we must take seriously.

There are countless studies documenting the devastating effects of adultery on spouses and children alike. Consider a few sobering statistics:

• Approximately 70 percent of betrayed spouses experience lasting damage to their self-esteem, and 30–60 percent experience clinically significant symptoms associated with post-traumatic stress.
• Around 60–70 percent of those who commit adultery report experiencing intense guilt, regret, and significant cognitive dissonance regarding their behavior.
• Approximately 80 percent of children who experience a parent’s infidelity develop a permanently altered view of romantic relationships and struggle to trust others. Nearly 88 percent report long-term anger toward the unfaithful parent.
• Roughly 43–53 percent of marriages affected by infidelity ultimately end in divorce.

These staggering statistics reinforce what God has already told us: adultery is destructive for everyone involved.

Marriage was God’s idea, and He intended it to be a lifelong covenant between one man and one woman (Genesis 2:24; Matthew 19:6). Throughout Scripture, we are repeatedly called to honor and protect that covenant. The writer of Hebrews says:

“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.”

The call to holiness is unmistakable. So, how do we obey this command?

Pastor John Piper addressed this question in a sermon on this passage, explaining that one of the primary ways we guard ourselves against temptation is by strengthening our faith:

“Now we have seen that sin is whatever is not from faith. Sin is what you feel and think and do when you are not taking God at his word and resting in his promises. So the command of Hebrews 13:4 can be stated like this: Let your sexual relations be free from any act or attitude that does not come from faith in God’s Word. Or to put it positively: Have those attitudes and do those acts in your marital sexual relations which grow out of the contentment that comes from confidence in God’s promises.”

Piper goes on to discuss the natural desires of the human body, making the point that faith doesn’t eliminate our hunger, but it keeps us from gluttony. It doesn’t remove our need for sleep, but it keeps us from becoming sluggards. In the same way, faith doesn’t eliminate sexual desire—it directs and governs it according to God’s design.

While the statistics and Scriptural warnings reveal the devastating consequences of adultery, they should never overshadow the beauty of a God-honoring marriage. As we strengthen our faith and walk in obedience to God’s commands, we discover that intimacy with our spouse is one of God’s good gifts—a source of joy and a powerful safeguard against the temptations of Satan.

God’s plan has always been, and always will be, the best plan.

College football has grown tremendously nationwide in recent years. With playoff expansion, “super conferences,” and multibillion-dollar TV deals, it has become much more than the traditional amateur competition it once was.

One thing that is hard to appreciate as a fan is watching top high school players “commit” to a school… then decommit… then recommit… then decommit again and choose a completely different school. I can’t pretend to know what it’s like to be a top-tier athlete choosing between major universities, especially now that thousands—or even millions—of dollars could be at stake because of NIL opportunities.

However, I do get tired of the lack of commitment. If you aren’t ready to choose a school, no problem—but don’t announce a commitment just for the clicks, only to flip to another school the night before signing your National Letter of Intent!

Commitment means “a promise or firm decision to do something.” It may not be the best term to use for college athletes selecting a school, but when it comes to marriage, it is exactly the right word.

God designed marriage to be a lifelong commitment between a man and a woman (Matthew 19:6). I have many 18- to 22-year-olds who work for me, and several of them are in the season of deciding whether it’s time to “pop the question.” I always offer two pieces of advice:

1. Don’t ask the question unless you’re confident you know what the answer will be.
2. It’s like Scott Hall used to describe the NWO: “For life.”

Most of them don’t get the NWO reference, but if you do, then we can be friends.

My point is that marriage is a lifelong covenant—a sacred one—and it should never be entered into lightly.

This week, we’ve studied God’s commandment, “You shall not commit adultery” (Exodus 20:14). As we’ve looked at what makes marriages strong and helps guard against temptations of every kind, one key characteristic continues to surface: active commitment from both spouses.

Active commitment has been described as “the daily, intentional practice of choosing your partner above your own immediate needs.” Paul echoes this principle in Ephesians as he describes the sacrificial relationship between husbands and wives (Ephesians 5:22–33). Choosing each day to place your spouse’s needs above your own is a powerful way to deepen your relationship and strengthen your marriage.

The expectation is clear. We are called to follow the example of Jesus by sacrificing our own desires for the good of our spouse and the health of the relationship. That’s what active commitment looks like—it is a choice we make every single day.

There are no “off days” in a marriage. Our best effort is required each day. We are human and therefore imperfect, but when both husband and wife embrace a lifestyle of sacrificial love and mutual commitment, the result is a marriage that honors both the Lord and one another.

My meeting Deanna was somewhat coincidental. We had worked together at a Super Target for a few years, but because we attended different high schools and worked in different departments, we didn’t spend much time together. I remember seeing her one day, and a friend said, “She’s cute, huh?” to which I replied, “Yes, she is.”

The Target where we worked was a popular viewing spot for the City of Woodstock’s annual fireworks show, which always made for a very busy evening. One year, I was scheduled to work the late shift. Usually, once the fireworks began around 9:00 p.m., the crowds would clear out and the rest of the evening would be smooth sailing.

Except that year.

A pop-up shower delayed the fireworks by nearly 45 minutes. The late start meant traffic lingered much longer than usual, and when I clocked out at 10:00 p.m., the parking lot was… well, a parking lot. No cars could get in or out.

I noticed Deanna standing outside, also wondering what to do about the traffic, so we struck up a conversation. The conversation lasted until traffic finally cleared. Then it continued at Taco Mac. When Taco Mac closed, it carried on at Waffle House. Now, 17 years into our marriage, the conversation is still going.

We’re like any other couple. We’ve experienced ups and downs and everything in between. One thing that hasn’t changed is that she is, without question, my very best friend. What began as an attraction grew into a friendship, and that friendship became a marriage.

This week, we’ve focused on the Lord’s commandment not to commit adultery, and I’ve tried to approach it from a positive perspective: building a marriage strong enough to withstand the temptation to look elsewhere.

One key component of lasting marriages is mutual respect. As I searched for practical examples of what respect looks like, I came across a list of reader-submitted advice for newlyweds. One of my favorite entries was this:

Five Rules for Marriage

1. Fight fair. No name-calling, no condescension, and no cursing. When emotions begin to take over, pause the argument and give yourselves time to cool down.
2. No Rolodex. Don’t file away past hurts and injustices in a mental Rolodex to use as ammunition in future arguments. Deal with the hurt now, while it can still be made right.
3. Choose compromises you can both live with. Whether the decision is big or small, make sure the outcome is something both of you can genuinely live with—because you’re both going to have to.
4. Create a safe place for vulnerability. Whether you’re sitting on the couch, lying in bed, or even soaking in the tub, find a place where you can communicate openly and honestly, even when the conversation is difficult or emotional.
5. Remember your future together. You’re going to live with this person tomorrow, next week, next year, and hopefully into retirement. Don’t let anger, indifference, or taking one another for granted rob you of the future you’re building together.

I don’t know who originally wrote those five rules, but I think they contain practical, relatable, and timeless wisdom. Choosing emotional intentionality and mutual respect—even during moments of conflict—strengthens a marriage. And a strong marriage helps keep our hearts focused on the path of purity and holiness the Lord has called us to walk.

Looking this week at the commandment, “You shall not commit adultery,” prompted a deeper dive into what long-lasting marriages typically have that helps prevent infidelity—of either the body or the heart—from ever beginning to creep in.

First, for the believer, marriage is a lifelong union between two people (Genesis 2:24) and is intended to be a permanent relationship (Matthew 19:6). It requires sacrificial love (Ephesians 5:22–33) and comes with stern warnings against defiling or dishonoring the marriage covenant (Hebrews 13:4). Relationships rooted in faith have a greater chance of enduring and thriving, with secular marriages experiencing a 30–50 percent higher rate of separation. Faith must come first.

After that, one common theme among strong and lasting marriages is a deep friendship between spouses. Deep friendship has been described as “an unconditional bond where you feel entirely seen, accepted, and safe.” I believe that level of trust can exist only between two people who intentionally make time to build a deep bond. It is built brick by brick through daily conversations, shared hobbies, and consistent check-ins.

I love family traditions, and we work hard to build them into our daily and weekly routines with our kids. We do pizza and a movie every Friday, have donut mornings on the weekends, and enjoy all sorts of little traditions together. For Deanna and me, when the kids are in school, we have a built-in weekday off together, so we go out for lunch and then grab an afternoon coffee before picking the kids up from the bus.

Coffee is a powerful currency in our house. We often share an afternoon iced coffee together and occasionally split a pastry. It’s a moment to decompress between work and the rest of the day’s responsibilities—getting the kids to the ballfield, band room, or basketball court while also making sure dinner and homework get done.

It isn’t about the coffee; it’s about the intentional conversation that happens because of it. Our friendship grows stronger every time we spend time talking with purpose. Those moments become opportunities for reflection, planning, encouragement, and simply enjoying one another’s company.

We also make it a point to have a date night at least once a month. We often try to catch a concert or a comedy show and make an evening of it, especially if we’ve already arranged for a babysitter. One thing that always amazes me is that whenever we get away from the house, the responsibilities of parenting, and the pressures of everyday life, I’m reminded why we liked each other in the first place. I often turn to Deanna and say, “This is so much fun. I remember why we enjoy doing this together.”

Whether we’re drinking an afternoon coffee, going to a Braves game, or seeing Metallica live, we genuinely have fun together, and every one of those moments strengthens our friendship. The bond built through laughter, joy, and shared experiences is often what carries us through the hardships, trials, and disappointments that inevitably come.

Your intentionality with your spouse matters, and it is one of the greatest safeguards against marital tension. Have the coffee. Go on the date. Share the smile.

“Lee… Hey, Lee.”

I woke up. It was roughly three in the morning. Delirious, I looked at Deanna and asked what was wrong. She had woken me from a dead sleep, and at the time she was several months pregnant, prompting a little concern on my end.

“I just had a dream… that you were cheating on me,” she said.

Puzzled and still very delirious, I replied, “Uh… okay… are you alright?”

She said how real the dream had felt and that she needed me to tell her I wasn’t, in fact, cheating on her. I was baffled but simply said, “Deanna, I haven’t and won’t ever cheat on you.” She said, “Okay,” and I hugged her, and we went back to sleep.

When morning came, we both shared a laugh about the absurdity of that overnight conversation, feeling it had been brought about by exhaustion and perhaps even made worse by hormonal fluctuations. Yet, that was more than ten years ago, and she still remembers how the dream made her feel.

The severity of infidelity is such that even a dream can prompt a series of painful thoughts and unbearable emotions. In our series on the Commandments, we visited God’s Word on the subject, and He is anything but ambiguous.

After commanding the Israelites not to commit adultery, God also established the penalty for violating that command in Leviticus 20 and Deuteronomy 22—execution. In Deuteronomy, adultery is included in a series of capital offenses accompanied by the phrase, “So you shall purge the evil from Israel.”

Jesus teaches that adultery doesn’t have to involve physical contact. It can begin as simply as looking at another person with “lustful intent” (Matthew 5:28). He also identifies sexual immorality as the only biblical ground for divorce (Matthew 19:9).

The point is simple: adultery is incredibly serious. Approximately 15–20 percent of marriages in the U.S. experience infidelity at some point, and unless serious and immediate action is taken, it often destroys the relationship. I had two friends experience this during high school when their parents were unfaithful, and even as a teenager, the effects were impossible to miss.

As Jesus warns, adultery isn’t limited to physical touch; it can begin with a single lingering glance. That’s why it’s up to us to strengthen our marriages, guard our hearts, and build relationships on a strong foundation of faith. So, how do we do that?

Plenty of statistical research exists on this, but successful long-term marriages typically share three common characteristics: deep friendship, mutual respect, and active commitment. I read that as saying one thing: it takes hard work!

Nothing worth pursuing in life comes without challenges along the way, but the reward far outweighs the cost. Marriages that last more than ten years—often considered long-term—are associated with greater life satisfaction, less conflict, and a stronger sense of self-worth, according to one study. The physical, emotional, and psychological benefits are undeniable.

Let’s work today to keep those painful thoughts and feelings confined to weary dreams and far away from reality.