Author: Lee Wilson

 

42 All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper), and to prayer. 43 A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. 44 And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. 45 They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. 46 They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity—47 all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved.

Acts 2:42 (NLT)

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HONOR GOD IN EVERYTHING

 

I am a very practical guy. I like big ideas, and I appreciate good vision casting, but I immediately want to dice them up into pragmatic and actionable plans. So, the final commitment we were challenged to make this past Sunday was to honor God every day.

Sounds simple, right? Well, how do we do that? I view this in three different categories for myself: as a spouse, as a father, and as an employee. So how do I honor God every day in each of these categories?

As a spouse, I try to do what Paul says in Ephesians and love my wife as Christ loved the church (Ephesians 5:25). This kind of love looks different every day but is rooted in the sacrificial love Christ had for His church.

Sometimes that means if she has to work late, I handle dinner and the kids, running to a baseball field or the grocery store if necessary. Other times, it means I grab her an iced coffee after an early morning for her. And sometimes, it is as simple as putting down the phone, turning the game off, and just listening to her.

When I put on my dad hat, the way I honor God looks different. As the father of two young boys, I spend a lot of time breaking up fights and breaking out the “dad voice” when needed. Other times, it’s the stuff dreams are made of, like playing catch with my sons.

One of the greatest baseball movies of all time is Field of Dreams. If you watch the whole movie, there are all kinds of intricate stories about ghosts, former players, and a magical cornfield. But how does the movie end? What is it all really about? It’s about a son who wants to play catch with his dad. I will stop anything I’m doing when one of my boys wants to play catch. I live for that.

As their dad, one of the keys is ensuring they see Jesus every day. We are finding new ways to introduce Scripture to them and make it part of our routine, but the best way they will see Jesus is in how I treat them and their mom. They are a precious gift that I thank God for every day, even on the hard ones.

Paul references the way he behaved with the Thessalonians “like a father with his own children,” encouraging them and urging them to “walk in a manner worthy of God” (1 Thessalonians 2:11-12). I think that is an ideal description of how I hope to raise my boys into men who walk in a manner worthy of God.

In order to provide for my wife and kids, I have to work. God blessed me with a job that pays the bills and enables me to be home every night and attend every baseball game or chorus performance. To honor God at work, I simply try to adhere to Paul’s command in Colossians:
“And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him” (Colossians 3:17).

If I do everything in the name of Jesus, I have a chance to honor God in everything I do.

 

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Lee Wilson and his wife, Deanna, have been NorthStar Church members since 2010. They are parents to Everett, Henry and Roselyn. Lee is passionate about sports (Go Braves, Go Dawgs) and has the pleasure to serve on the worship team as a bassist.

 

 

42 All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper), and to prayer. 43 A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. 44 And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. 45 They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. 46 They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity—47 all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved.

Acts 2:42 (NLT)

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BE BOLD ENOUGH TO SHARE

 

One of the commitments we were challenged to make this past Sunday was to share Christ with unbelievers. At the end of the Gospel of Matthew is the famous Great Commission, where Jesus challenged His followers to do that very thing. After His resurrection, Jesus commands the eleven remaining disciples to make “disciples of all nations” and assures us that He is with us to the end of the age (Matthew 28:16-20).

Sharing Christ is sometimes the most daunting task a believer can have. The conversations can be challenging. We might be afraid to broach the subject with someone for fear of their response, or perhaps we doubt our ability to articulate it correctly since we aren’t theologically trained.

The bottom line is an uncomfortable truth—you have been commanded by your Lord to do it. We all have different people in our paths to whom God has intended for us to reflect Christ. Sometimes our testimony can be through our actions, sometimes through our words, and sometimes through our story.

Yet we must always be prepared to give a reason for the hope that is in us (1 Peter 3:15). Have you ever stopped to consider that? I don’t know about you, but I don’t get randomly asked every day why I am a Christian. I sometimes doubt if I could even give a substantive answer to that question, so I have tried to “be prepared” by finding people who are smarter than me (which is easy) to give advice.

Dr. John Piper preached on this very text once and offered direct guidance on how we are supposed to be prepared to give this reason. He first cited Luke 21:14, in which Jesus is preparing His disciples for the persecution they will face:
“There will be a time for you to bear testimony. Settle it therefore in your hearts not to meditate beforehand how to make your case. For I will give you a mouth and wisdom which none of your adversaries will be able to withstand or contradict.”

In this guidance, Jesus clearly says not to meditate beforehand on your answer and instead promises to speak through you when that moment comes. What a relief!

So what does Peter mean when he says to always be prepared? Piper points to the beginning of that verse, where we are commanded to reverence Christ or to regard Him as holy, depending on your translation. This reverence is the key, according to Piper:
“Reverence the Lord Christ in your heart, and you will always have a reason to give for why you are hopeful.”

We can all agree the world needs Christ, and we are commanded to be part of the way He is revealed in this world. Feel the relief that this isn’t a call to be a theologian; the only thing you need to do is revere Christ. When the time comes to share, Christ promises to give you the words to say!

 

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Lee Wilson and his wife, Deanna, have been NorthStar Church members since 2010. They are parents to Everett, Henry and Roselyn. Lee is passionate about sports (Go Braves, Go Dawgs) and has the pleasure to serve on the worship team as a bassist.

 

 

42 All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper), and to prayer. 43 A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. 44 And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. 45 They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. 46 They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity—47 all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved.

Acts 2:42 (NLT)

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GOING THE EXTRA MILE

 

I have worked at a Chick-fil-A restaurant for almost nine years. Obviously, restaurant success is often predicated on how good your food is, but it is carried by the service you provide and the way in which you provide it.

One of the hallmarks of Truett Cathy’s company is “Second Mile Service.” It is a part of restaurant training for team members and is at the core of the company’s direction. The idea is to go the “extra mile” in order to surpass expectations and delight the guest.

It takes its root in Matthew 5:41, which states simply, “If anyone makes you go one mile, go with him two miles.” Going the extra mile, in my opinion, is what makes Chick-fil-A different than any other restaurant. You can find good chicken or fast service at other places, but the way you feel when you are at a Chick-fil-A should be the differentiator.

I am responsible for the hiring and orientation at our location, and we take a lot of care to build an eye for service among our teams. We focus on finding opportunities to go the extra mile. Sometimes it is as small as carrying out a high chair for a mom who has her hands full with children, and other times, bigger moments present themselves.

This past Sunday, we were challenged to commit to loving others through service, especially since, as Christians, people watch what we do. Our reputation matters because we have the honor and responsibility of being flagbearers for Christ. What an honor that is!

The idea of walking around carrying a flag that says “Christian” on it should influence each and every move we make. While none of us is perfect, we should daily strive to be more Christ-like in all that we do. The Apostle John says, “By this we know we are in him: whoever says he abides in him ought to walk in the same way in which he walked” (1 John 2:5-6).

Sometimes I get tripped up because I am acutely aware of all the ways I fall short of Christ. I have no grand delusions of any sense of worthiness for Christ. While that is true, it doesn’t change the fact that we are clearly commanded to walk like Him every day.

One of the key elements in accomplishing this is to spend time with Him, both in prayer and in the Word. These habits must be a part of our daily walk, or else we can experience drift and become lost.

Paul offers us several practical ways in which we can love others and walk like Christ, chief among them being his simple claim in Colossians 3:17:
“And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.”

This is our lens through which we do anything and everything—to do it all in the name of Christ!

 

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Lee Wilson and his wife, Deanna, have been NorthStar Church members since 2010. They are parents to Everett, Henry and Roselyn. Lee is passionate about sports (Go Braves, Go Dawgs) and has the pleasure to serve on the worship team as a bassist.

 

 

42 All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper), and to prayer. 43 A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. 44 And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. 45 They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. 46 They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity—47 all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved.

Acts 2:42 (NLT)

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BE ATOMIC

 

A few years ago, I was able to attend a leadership conference in Chicago. It was my first trip to that beautiful city, and the experience was capped off by an afternoon at the friendly confines, where the Braves coincidentally happened to be in town. An unforgettable experience.

The conference was filled with great speakers, but only a few really resonated with me. Chief among them was James Clear, the author of one of my favorite books, Atomic Habits. After hearing Clear speak, I immediately bought the book and began reading it.

It is an easy read, and the concept is fairly simple, yet extremely applicable and practical. The idea is to create habits that help improve your performance or a particular skill incrementally—1% at a time. The concept is predicated on the notion that we can’t make wholesale changes all at once but instead have to focus on building a process that helps us make small improvements constantly. By doing this, we build on our success and make incremental gains over time, which culminate in the wholesale change we are seeking.

One of the best examples he uses is the British Olympic cycling team, which was so bad at one point that they were not allowed to use branded materials to compete, for fear in the cycling world that their poor performance would damage the brands. They adopted this incremental gains approach and, in time, became an Olympic superpower.

We can apply these principles to working out in the gym, improving our grades at school, or growing in our spiritual walk. This past Sunday, we were challenged to commit to growing spiritually.

Spiritual growth can look different in methodology for all of us. You might have the goal of reading the whole Bible in the new year, and that’s a great goal to have. Odds are, you can’t read it in a day. So, you will have to build and develop a routine to read a little at a time and ultimately reach your goal as the year progresses.

My goal for growing spiritually in 2025 centers around my two sons and my wife. I feel like we need to reset for the new year, as my boys are getting older and are ready for a deeper approach to faith.

2024 was a very busy working year for my wife and me, and that presented some new challenges to our faith journey. So, we are recalibrating what that looks like moving forward, and we don’t yet have the answer. Sometimes, not having the answer is what feels daunting.

We can’t reach the mountaintop right away, and that can demotivate us from even beginning to climb. But if we take one step at a time, we can reach our ultimate destination. The key is to keep climbing—or growing. Because whatever isn’t growing is dying.

 

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Lee Wilson and his wife, Deanna, have been NorthStar Church members since 2010. They are parents to Everett, Henry and Roselyn. Lee is passionate about sports (Go Braves, Go Dawgs) and has the pleasure to serve on the worship team as a bassist.

 

 

42 All the believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching, and to fellowship, and to sharing in meals (including the Lord’s Supper), and to prayer. 43 A deep sense of awe came over them all, and the apostles performed many miraculous signs and wonders. 44 And all the believers met together in one place and shared everything they had. 45 They sold their property and possessions and shared the money with those in need. 46 They worshiped together at the Temple each day, met in homes for the Lord’s Supper, and shared their meals with great joy and generosity—47 all the while praising God and enjoying the goodwill of all the people. And each day the Lord added to their fellowship those who were being saved.

Acts 2:42 (NLT)

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MARROW DEEP

 

We hear from our pastor, Mike Linch, all the time that we weren’t meant to do life alone. God demonstrates this in His will for mankind by saying that the first human ever, Adam, “shouldn’t be alone” (Genesis 2:18). We need companionship, we need love, and we need friendship.

On March 4, 1861, our 16th President was sworn into office. Just over a month into his presidency, the Civil War began. Needless to say, there would be a great need for companionship, friendship, and guidance in the months that followed for Abraham Lincoln.

At the onset of the war, Lincoln was routinely involved in the military movements and decision-making at a close level. While Lincoln was well-read in history, the former lawyer and congressman wasn’t keen on making military decisions and sought to relinquish that responsibility to a qualified and like-minded military mind.

The problem for the President was finding the right man. As the conflict drew on, Lincoln eventually decided to move on from General George McClellan, who was charismatic and popular among his direct reports but lacked the ability to mesh with the folksy western lawyer in Lincoln.

Lincoln set his sights on General Ulysses Grant, who earned several promotions after successful battle campaigns and possessed a relentless pursuit of victory. Despite several advisors offering criticism of the flawed man in Grant, Lincoln stuck with his gut and forged an unbreakable friendship with him.

The friendship of the two men who would ultimately lead the Union to victory was forged in the fires of criticism. Both men were routinely doubted for their abilities to accomplish that task, and within the walls of their friendship came the crucial decisions that would win the war.

In the 2012 movie entitled Lincoln, we find the President pondering a crucial decision that Grant has advised him to make. While debating aloud whether or not to do it, he says of Grant, “My trust in him is marrow deep.”

We were challenged this past Sunday to get to know others more deeply. I’d say “marrow deep” is about as deep as it gets.

I have often thought of that line and wondered, “Who do I hold in that regard?” That list isn’t (and probably shouldn’t be) that long. Those types of relationships are forged in the battles we fight in life.

We know the battles are coming, for Jesus Himself warns us that in this life, we will find trouble. But He has overcome this world (John 16:33). Praise God for that! But now what?

While we wait for Him to return, we have to find the people He leaves in our path to help us win the daily battles we face, as well as the battles that bring us to our knees and shake us to the core. We have to find our “marrow deep” people, and we have to be that person for others.

For we weren’t meant to do life alone!

 

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Lee Wilson and his wife, Deanna, have been NorthStar Church members since 2010. They are parents to Everett, Henry and Roselyn. Lee is passionate about sports (Go Braves, Go Dawgs) and has the pleasure to serve on the worship team as a bassist.

 

 

 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, ² when they see your respectful and pure conduct. ³ Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— ⁴ but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. ⁵ For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, ⁶ as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

⁷ Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you^[a] of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

1 Peter 3:1-7  (NLT)

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TRUE LOVE

 

Romance is a fickle thing, and like lightning, it can strike when you least expect it. Deanna and I first connected one night at work. The Super Target where we both worked during high school and college used to be a viewing spot for fireworks on July 4th.

Due to some late rain, the fireworks were delayed, and we got stuck in awful traffic after work. By happenstance, we started having a conversation in the parking lot. I should mention that at the time, I was dating another girl and wasn’t looking for a relationship. Yet, as we talked, the night went on and on, well beyond the traffic, and the only thing keeping me there was the conversation. In other words, there were… fireworks! Sorry, couldn’t resist.

I got home late that day with a bittersweet feeling. I knew I was in love, and it wasn’t with the girl I was dating. Fast forward, and we’ve been married for 15 years.

A coworker of mine recently got married, and he asked me, “What’s the secret to staying married?” I simply replied, “There is no secret—just mean what you say at the altar, and you’ll be good.”

As we reflect on this week’s message, we’ve discussed the roles of husbands and wives, the importance of self-sacrifice, and the way children can complicate things. At this point, I’d like to underscore the bedrock of it all: love.

I am so thankful for the gift of love. Our example for love is very simple—it’s Jesus. “For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16). There is no greater example of love than this.

We get to experience all kinds of love, whether with spouses, children, friends, or extended family. But the love you share with your spouse is special. It’s unique, intimate, and beautiful.

In Song of Solomon, it says:
“…for love is strong as death, jealousy is fierce as the grave.
Its flashes are flashes of fire, the very flame of the Lord.
Many waters cannot quench love, neither can floods drown it.
If a man offered for love all the wealth of his house,
he would be utterly despised.” (SoS 8:6-7)

I don’t know how I would describe the love I have with Deanna, but this passage feels more accurate than anything I could come up with. If we can focus less on ourselves and more on our spouse, using the loving example of our Lord, maybe we can live in this love that cannot be quenched.

I would also like to personally thank Daniel Hoover for his contributions to this week’s devotionals. Daniel is someone I hold in the absolute highest regard, and it was a joy to share his wisdom with you.

He and Bonnie offer a range of services to couples, dealing with topics from infertility to infidelity to conflict resolution, through their ministry called The Marriage Adventure. You can find them here:

themarriageadventure.com
@themarriageadventure on Facebook and Instagram
The Marriage Adventure Podcast can be found wherever you listen to podcasts.

 

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Lee Wilson and his wife, Deanna, have been NorthStar Church members since 2010. They are parents to Everett, Henry and Roselyn. Lee is passionate about sports (Go Braves, Go Dawgs) and has the pleasure to serve on the worship team as a bassist.

 

 

 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, ² when they see your respectful and pure conduct. ³ Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— ⁴ but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. ⁵ For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, ⁶ as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

⁷ Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you^[a] of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

1 Peter 3:1-7  (NLT)

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PARENTHOOD

 

We recently took on one of the modern world’s greatest challenges to the family—a trip to Disney World. The unforgiving heat, the thousands of steps, and the debate over whether or not the Lightning Lanes are worth it (they are—in for a penny, in for a pound). Not much can wear down the collective patience of a family faster than that combination of sweat, money, lines, and steps. You experience the full gamut of emotions at Disney, that’s for certain.

A movie that displays all the emotions of parenthood is Parenthood with Steve Martin. A great example of a dad stepping up to the plate to preserve his family’s well-being is when his son, Kevin, is having a birthday party. He had hired a cowboy impersonator for the party, and a bunch of kids had shown up just for that.

When he found out the cowboy was unavailable, he threw a Hail Mary to save the party—he grabbed a cowboy hat and made a fool of himself as a cowboy for an hour, much to the delight of his son and the other kids. This act brought great joy to his wife and all the children, and he won the day by putting them first.

That movie does a great job of showing the different angles and stresses parenting can place on a marriage. Once you have kids, your capacity to love, fear, worry, stress, and hope all seem to grow. You never knew you could love someone that much or worry about someone that much.

It is important, however, to maintain boundaries between kids and parents. As we continue consulting Pastoral Counselor and Marriage Adventure Co-founder Daniel Hoover, I asked him to speak on this subject:

“This year my parents will celebrate 64 years of marriage,” reflected Hoover. “I remember my mom always saying, ‘The greatest thing I can do for you boys is to love your dad.’ She was right. My parents maintained a healthy and connected marriage. This created such a foundation for me and my family. My mom and dad loved me, but they had no problem letting me know that the world didn’t revolve around me.”

It feels like we live in a time that magnifies the child, often placing them above the spousal relationship. It sounds selfless, but in the end, it can be harmful to the long-term well-being of the child.

“It’s important to remember, kids should come second!” said Hoover. “We’re all looking for validation and love, and when our kids are small, they offer us validation. They make us feel important. They’re so cute and cuddly… and selfish! Kids should be taught that they don’t run the home—Mom and Dad do. Our children will be happier, healthier, and better adults if they are raised with an understanding that the world doesn’t revolve around them. If the health of your marriage suffers, the children will also suffer.”

 

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Lee Wilson and his wife, Deanna, have been NorthStar Church members since 2010. They are parents to Everett, Henry and Roselyn. Lee is passionate about sports (Go Braves, Go Dawgs) and has the pleasure to serve on the worship team as a bassist.

 

 

 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, ² when they see your respectful and pure conduct. ³ Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— ⁴ but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. ⁵ For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, ⁶ as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

⁷ Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you^[a] of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

1 Peter 3:1-7  (NLT)

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THE ADVICE OF A GRANDFATHER

 

When I was a teenager, I had a conversation with my grandfather one morning. We were on a family vacation to the Outer Banks, a family favorite of ours, and he and I were drinking coffee and watching the sunrise while everyone else slept.

My grandmother had passed away several years earlier, and he was reflecting on their marriage. He shared a quote with me that I’ve never forgotten: “When you get married, it should be you and her against the world.”

I love that idea. Life isn’t easy, and finding a husband or wife you can face it with—knowing unequivocally that you have each other’s back—is something we should all be so lucky to find.

When reflecting on the challenges that couples face these days, Pastoral Counselor and Marriage Adventure co-founder Daniel Hoover narrowed it down to two critical challenges:

“Our biggest threat to a godly marriage is SELF,” said Hoover. “When we aren’t abiding in or walking with Christ daily, that old, fleshly, selfish nature begins to rear its ugly head. However, when both spouses are walking with Christ daily and submitting to His authority, we find it much easier to die to ourselves and serve one another.”

The second threat is easy to guess: DISCONNECTION.

“It’s rampant in our society,” said Hoover. “Whether it’s watching TikTok or reels, playing video games, or spending countless hours at the ball field, couples today are more disconnected than ever! A deep, meaningful connection in marriage takes intentionality. Think about when you and your spouse first met—chances are, you went on dates, talked for hours on the phone, and went on fun trips. However, as life and seasons change, many couples allow kids, work, and hobbies to rob them of meaningful connection.”

The “diseases” of SELF and DISCONNECTION are easy to spot, and both can pose major threats to the health of our marriages. Daniel offered these remedies to counteract these threats:

1. Go to bed at the same time (without turning on the TV). This creates margin in your day and allows you and your spouse to have “pillow talk” before falling asleep. It also creates time for other fun bedroom antics.

2. Offer bids for connection throughout the day. A bid for connection is when one partner reaches out to the other for interest, conversation, or expressing a need. The healthiest couples talk about everything and nothing at the same time. It could be sending a sweet text during the day, stopping in the hallway to offer an extended hug, complimenting them on how nice they look, or stopping by Starbucks to get their favorite coffee drink.

3. Once a quarter, get away for a night (without the kids). It sounds like a lot, but it’s only four times a year. It doesn’t have to be extravagant. If you can’t afford to get away, send the kids to the grandparents’ or a friend’s house.

 

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Lee Wilson and his wife, Deanna, have been NorthStar Church members since 2010. They are parents to Everett, Henry and Roselyn. Lee is passionate about sports (Go Braves, Go Dawgs) and has the pleasure to serve on the worship team as a bassist.

 

 

 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, ² when they see your respectful and pure conduct. ³ Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— ⁴ but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. ⁵ For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, ⁶ as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

⁷ Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you^[a] of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

1 Peter 3:1-7  (NLT)

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KNOW YOUR ROLE

 

I am married to a very strong-willed and outspoken wife, and those are qualities I love about her. You never have to question her; she will tell you exactly how she feels and exactly what she needs or wants. In our 15 years of marriage, I like to think I’ve become better, or more proficient, at understanding how to meet those needs and serve her.

For example, some people’s love language is acts of service or physical touch. Deanna’s is a solid two-hour nap and an iced coffee when she wakes up. Whatever love language you call that, it’s hers. I understand that about her, and on Sundays after church, I try to take care of our kids so she can have a restful afternoon and an iced Americano when she wakes up. That does far more for her affection toward me than flowers, candy, or even a nice dinner ever would.

As we raise our sons and both work full time, we try to be mindful of taking care of and serving one another in the small ways we can. Life is a grind, and prioritizing biblical guidance for our lifelong partnership is a must for us, as it should be for anyone. Keep Jesus at the center, and follow His lead in serving your partner over yourself.

Life will continue to stretch and grow you, so the roles we play as spouses aren’t always clear-cut. According to pastoral counselor Daniel Hoover, it’s not uncommon for the roles we play for one another to evolve over time.

“When addressing spousal roles, Scripture doesn’t assign duties to either the husband or wife,” Hoover said. “God created us all with different gifts and talents. Some couples are more traditional, and some are more unconventional. This can also change over different seasons of life. It comes down to the heart in which we interact and submit to one another in the marriage union.”

Part of growing in your relationship over time could be this evolution, and embracing those potential changes could be key to how we serve our spouses.

“I believe it is important to allow grace when seasons change and a spouse might sense a different calling. For example, before we had children, Bonnie was called to serve and work directly beside me in our day-to-day ministry (careers). However, as our children have gotten older, she has pulled back from that and geared her attention more toward them and creating our home environment. While at first this was difficult for me, it was important for her that I remain understanding of God’s unique calling in her life.”

Change is inevitable. As we face new changes and challenges over time, it’s important to have grace for our spouses as we navigate the uncharted together.

 

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Lee Wilson and his wife, Deanna, have been NorthStar Church members since 2010. They are parents to Everett, Henry and Roselyn. Lee is passionate about sports (Go Braves, Go Dawgs) and has the pleasure to serve on the worship team as a bassist.

 

 

 Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, ² when they see your respectful and pure conduct. ³ Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— ⁴ but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious. ⁵ For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves, by submitting to their own husbands, ⁶ as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord. And you are her children, if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.

⁷ Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you^[a] of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

1 Peter 3:1-7  (NLT)

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SUBMIT TO ONE ANOTHER

 

Having the opportunity to write for the Digging Deeper team is an honor and a responsibility that I do not take lightly. When I saw that my topic was marriage, along with some very important scripture about it, I felt intimidated by the task of addressing it.

So, I decided to ask someone more studied and credentialed to offer some insight. Daniel Hoover, who served on staff at Northstar for nearly two decades, founded and leads a ministry called The Marriage Adventure with his wife, Bonnie. Who better to ask for help than him? Daniel kindly agreed to provide some insight and will be featured several times this week.

In 1 Peter, chapter three, wives are called to submit to their husbands (v. 5), and husbands are called to honor their wives (v. 7). Similarly, Paul references the idea of spousal submission in Ephesians when he says wives should submit to their husbands as the church submits to Christ (Eph. 5:24), while husbands should love their wives as they love themselves (5:28).

So, what does biblical submission look like practically?

“Paul commands us all to ‘Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ,’” said Hoover, referencing Ephesians 5:21. “As Christians, we are to submit to each other. This means that we should think of the other person first, or before ourselves, yielding to each other when possible. Paul is addressing all believers, regardless of gender or socioeconomic status, in this verse. Then, in verse 22, he narrows his focus to marriage.”

This point is significant: we are to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. It only makes sense that this concept would carry over into marriage. Additionally, the original audience for Paul’s and Peter’s teachings would have been dramatically different from today’s.

“In that time, women were viewed as property,” Hoover said. “It was understood that a woman was supposed to submit to any and every man. However, Paul was saying that a woman isn’t to submit to every man. Women aren’t lesser than men. He was saying to submit only to your own husband. This is also the understanding Peter displays in 1 Peter 3:1. This was incredibly liberating for women in that day; it actually lifted women up from public oppression.”

This idea of submission is a continuation of the death to self that we endure as believers. In the confines of marriage, placing the needs of your partner ahead of your own is a noble pursuit. However, Daniel wanted to emphasize one important distinction:

“It’s also important to note that when these passages talk about submission, we aren’t commanded to submit to one another’s sin,” said Hoover. “Colossians 3:18 says, ‘Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.’ Wives have a higher authority than their husband, and that is Christ the Lord. We should always remember that a husband is a servant leader, not a tyrannical ruler.”

May we each strive to out-serve one another, as is fitting to the Lord, each day!

 

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Lee Wilson and his wife, Deanna, have been NorthStar Church members since 2010. They are parents to Everett, Henry and Roselyn. Lee is passionate about sports (Go Braves, Go Dawgs) and has the pleasure to serve on the worship team as a bassist.