Digging Deeper – Love God, Love People

A long time ago, I received some good advice. I’ve heard this sentiment repeated often, but I’m pretty sure the first person to share it with me was Mr. Bassitt, my leadership class teacher at St. Albans High School. (I know—another SAHS story—but I learned a lot about life in high school.) He said you should pay attention to the way people treat those who are serving them. The way you treat the waitstaff at a restaurant or the cashier at the store shows how you really feel about people. That’s why, he said, taking someone out to eat is a great first date: not only do you get to sit and talk with someone for an extended period, but you also get to see how they interact with the servers.

Through the years, I’ve seen this play out over and over. Perhaps it’s just my perception, but when I see someone treat a server poorly, I assume they don’t like people very much. However, I think it goes deeper than that. It reveals the default feelings people have about others. One behavior reveals another.

Jesus and John both point to this same idea in the scripture above: one action or attitude reveals another. The way we love people relates directly to the way we love God. This seems very important, because one is evident to those around us while the other is easier to hide—even from ourselves.

I think we can fool ourselves about how we really feel. I remember going to lunch with a guy who wanted to intern with me for the summer. As we were eating, he told me he was a “people person” and listed all the clubs and groups he was part of at college. But the only time he spoke to our waitress was to order his food and ask for a drink refill. When it came time to pay, he said I shouldn’t leave a full tip because the waitress was “scowly.” Apparently, in his book, smiling was a requirement for a tip.

As we headed back to the church, I told him what I had observed. He seemed surprised. At first, he was defensive and thought I was being unfair: “I told you I really am a people person!” To his credit, as he started to verbalize his thoughts, he realized he wasn’t treating people the way he should—unless they had something to offer him. At the same time, he expected others to treat him well. He ended up not interning for me, but years later he contacted me to thank me for that lesson.

Like a thermometer when you’re sick, how you treat people around you is a good way to diagnose whether your relationship with God is healthy. Take a minute to check your spiritual temperature. How are you showing love to those around you—both the familiar and the unfamiliar? Take a moment to pray and ask God to show you where you’re missing the mark in your relationships, and ask Him to strengthen your relationship with Him.

And as always, don’t forget to tip your waitress.